Forgiveness and Faith

Robyn Whitaker, Associate Professor of New Testament at Pilgrim, writes about the complexities of forgiveness when it comes to gendered violence.

ROBYN WHITAKER – Pilgrim Theological College

“Forgiveness lies at the heart of Christian faith. The gospels portray Jesus announcing ‘your sins are forgiven’ through his ministry, something we continue to proclaim on Sunday mornings in liturgies around the world. Forgiveness is central to our own experience of God’s grace and to our relationships with one another. 

But, for survivors of domestic and family violence (or other abuse), forgiveness can be a problematic area of Christian theology. For some, forgiveness is a profound, life-giving grace that allows them to move on.  Others talk about feeling the pressure to forgive and not knowing how. How do you let go of anger, resentment or hurt after abuse? In the worst cases, forgiveness is coerced or even part of the pattern of abuse.   

Julia Baird notes the problematic possibilities of forgiveness in her book ‘Bright Shining’ writing, “the assumption often tends to be that it’s good to forgive. Even that you must forgive. Even if, in many cases, forgiveness can be poison for the abused”. 

…if we understand forgiveness does not negate justice, we might appreciate it for the spiritual gift it is. One of the biblical Greek words translated for forgiveness (aphiemi) means ‘letting go’ or ‘releasing’ (the other is grace, charis).  Forgiveness then, can be a way of letting go of the hold that an abuser has over one’s life, a way of releasing the anger and hurt. Forgiveness can be healing. That is the good news we proclaim. But… only if we don’t conflate it with forgetting.”  

You can read the full article at https://crosslight.org.au/2026/08/20/faith-and-forgiveness/